I am an internet lurker. I follow great blogs, people and have actually met these people in person. One thing I’ve noticed Â is how markedly differently people can be in person from their internet personas. A person that’s quite eloquent on their blog can be pretty quiet in person. An Instagram personality, almost unrecognizable without their filters.
My six readers, I understand I am the same way. I don’t usually wax poetic about life and all its quirks, and analyze positively about most things like this blog and all its entries reflect.
To be honest, and readers, since you mostly know me in person (or are related to me, whatever), you know that I am a mostly sarcastic, sometimes offensive joke cracking wisebutt in conversation. My reputation at the last company I worked for that had a team that met in person once a month, have told me that I always sound like there’s a double entendre in most things I say. Birthdays I usually send links to a kind of offensive video to friends that denote something will be going on that day.
And yes, I do realize how easy it is to filter out the elements of your life that you don’t want people to find out about you. It’s always so tempting to present the most idealized version of us to the world, the one that’s always put together, or only have flaws that are adorable. So let me be a little more open right now, six readers, and let me know if I’m missing anything that you feel needs to be said.
- I have a short temper. I’ve been known to lose patience quickly but I am trying to learn to reel it in, especially since I don’t have a poker face to hide what I feel at any given time.
- I am a crazy bunny lady. Most of my day, if not focused at work, is focused on keeping my bunnies happy and healthy. Since I lost my bunny in June, I’ve been obsessing about the other one’s health and well being.
- My coping mechanism is food. I usually look for something to eat when I’m annoyed or stressed or want to celebrate. Even when I’m sick, I’m always hungry. The one time I remember not being hungry is when my bunny died in June and I skipped a few meals because I was so devastated (told ya I was a crazy bunny lady).
- I’m not very touchy feely. I use humor as a defense and don’t usually start emotional conversations. I can’t remember the last time I told my family I love them. We don’t hug unless it’s to annoy the other person.
- I can be very passive aggressive. I hate this part of my personality and I want to be more confrontational and upfront, but years and years of indoctrination and getting that same treatment from people close to me, it’s hard to not be the same.
- I have an incessant desire to help. It can be detrimental to my wallet, my mood, my overall well being, but if I see something I can fix or help with, I will try to do it. I’ve had friendships break because of this, because I had thought I warranted the same devotion, but I do realize just because we’re good to other people, doesn’t mean they will be to you, and that sometimes my definition of help is actually meddling, or that “good” is actually annoying/judgmental.
- I gossip. I’m trying not to do this because I hate being talked about behind my back, but when you talk to the same people every single week, day in and day out, it’s hard to not listen.
What parts of your personality do you think you usually hide from the general public?