The human heart was—and remains—a mystery to me. But I’m learning. I have to. —Anthony Bourdain

Pat yourself in the back today

Hello, everyone who’s going through a quarter life, midlife, single life, married life, crisis.


It’s me, Jody. I have been there, and I’m still there. Lost, sometimes dissatisfied, always wanting more. I recently watched the movie The Pursuit of Happyness and found myself struck by the words in the movie, “preservation of life, & liberty, & the pursuit of happiness”. It left me asking, will we always be in the pursuit of happiness? Or are some people perfectly happy where they are? I ask, because, while I am happy, I am always on the lookout for the next big thing, the next step. Where do we take life when we’re hardwired to look for bigger things under the ideology of ambition and success. But what is success? I know I’ve asked this before, and so far, I haven’t found anyone who considers themselves successful and is good to stay where they are. In conversations, everyone is always waiting for the next step, a higher goal.


Does it set us up for success or failure? Will we always feel incomplete because we’re always in pursuit? Or will it keep us moving, always working and always finding something to strive for.


For me, now, it depends on your perspective. I’ve always read that the most successful people are the ones who never give up, who keep on working. And then there are those who are quite cool with the simple things, those that sit at the end of the day and think themselves lucky to have their one bedroom apartment, dog, and netflix streaming.


I say, define your own success and pat yourself on the back today. You got through another night, you woke up with all your faculties, you can sing (even if you can’t hit one note), you have that cup of coffee to stay awake. Even with a grueling commute to an exhausting job that you spend 50 hours a week on that still isn’t enough to get you through your vacation in three months, it’s there, you know you’re able to eat in a few hours.

Pat yourself on the back for smiling at the colleague who looks like he’s going through something today, but is too quiet to say a word. Or for not burning the toast when you forgot to take it out before you took a shower.


Pat yourself on the back for being you, because you are awesome. You believe it today, and the world will find out about it soon.


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