Jodythinks.com

The human heart was—and remains—a mystery to me. But I’m learning. I have to. —Anthony Bourdain

Life is short, week 34 of 52

Status update: Two days of incredibly uncomfortable hearburn had me on my knees. Had me trying to figure out if giving up my start of work coffee and eventual caffeine withdrawal migraines is a bigger pain in the butt. Isn’t growing up awful?

Moments of the week:

1. Spontaneous outings that actually happen. Sunday Korean barbecue decided on 3 hours before and it actually happened. A great meal, then hanging out a friend’s place, then spontaneous massage appointments. Nothing like a super chill semi social day with people that have no expectations of who I can be besides myself. And laughing our asses off the whole time.

2. Chester’s 8th gotcha day. I have had more time with Chester than a lot of people that have come and go. It terrifies me how much of an old bun he is sometimes, but I am cherishing every second. He’s my emotional support animal, and I hope I am his. If that sounds sad, well, I just have to be okay with that.

3. Baseline setting with myself. Over and over, people keep showing me who they really are, and I want to start believing them. I am, at 36 years old, still using these filters of what I want people to be, not who they actually are. Even if they repeatedly reveal the opposite. If I want to survive this, I have to remember to just accept it.

Song of the week: Always on Time by Ashanti and Ja Rule

-J

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