Status report: BP monitor broke and I couldn’t get readings for 3 days, which coincided with a migraine that would not quit for 2. I must’ve had 4 coffees and 3 advils a day to try and address it, but the drugs and caffeine wouldn’t work. Recent theory, too much heat.

My happy things:

1. This moment from Fleabag. In as much as this was a pretty messed up pairing in theory, the chemistry, the connection, all the things that led to this bittersweet moment, it just, makes the emo teenager in me come alive. Especially the line “When you find somebody you love, it feels like hope.”, in this incredibly hellish simulation of modern life, hope feels preposterous.

2. Two amazing restaurants in a week. One family favorite, and one we tried once and have always wanted to get back to. It’s very difficult to get our dad to try anything, or really, deviate from the 5 restaurants he picks from on a regular basis. This can get frustratingly challenging sometimes, especially for birthdays that are not his. However, we were able to get to places this past week that he didn’t hate. Wins in themselves. But also, meals that I don’t have to think about that just go well? Great.

3. Phone calls. See, most of my phone calls are things I have to attend for work. Some were incredibly tense last week, but I did get on non tense, just refreshingly honest ones with friends last week. When people you love are 11000++ kilometers away, this is one of the few options to be there for each other. Unless you want to spend several thousand dollars and 14 hours in a plane. Which, I may still do eventually this year. I just have to figure it out. At a minimum, 5 states, 11 cities to see everyone i Iove, with a hell of a lot of planning and money burning. For now, facetimes and commiserating. Discussing big things, or nonsensical ones. Just being in the same “space” for a while. It helps a lot.

Songs of the week:

So Good Right Now by Fall Out Boy

Talking to Myself by Lauv

Girl Be Mine by Francis M

-J