(Don’t tell my mom) this weekend was probably the most nerve wracking road trip I’ve ever been on. The furthest for sure (Ilocos Sur), and certainly the most rain. At the heaviest point, with our wiper blades already quite out, we could only see the car in front of us. The drive was more than 400 kilometers and I could feel every single one as the rain pounded down. And it didn’t stop. It was raining the whole time we were in Vigan and Sinait, and it was a relief to be dry indoors so we spent a lot of it just staying in our hotel room the first day in.

It is a testament to how laid back/we actually like each other that we didn’t kill each other on this trip. We had our share of being lost, sick and hung over. There was trash talk over the card game we kept playing. We couldn’t find decent coffee. It was, a lot of time spent in a small space with not a lot to distract us, because even the internet was difficult to come by.

However I am grateful to have spent this time with friends, even through all this dampness. We had really good, inexpensive, local street food (I am currently obsessed with Chicken Pipian, this congee style dish w

ith toasted rice, epazote, chicken, squash and kamias). We got a little stir crazy. We went body surfing in the storm. We got pelted with storm level rain in weirdly lukewarm ocean water. It was great to see what we could of the city through the eyes of my friend whose mom grew up there, and meeting her relatives that were nothing but helpful and always smiling at us, even if they were a little weirded out that we went to the city in this much rain.

It was wonderful. When I wasn’t tearing up about Anthony Bourdain or eating extra pork in his memory, my warm and fuzzy heart was full. (And my heart isn’t usually warm and fuzzy, just ask my friends) The simple joy of spending time with people I loved, not necessarily doing anything in the same space. I know of very few people that can say this about the people around them, and I count myself lucky to have these folks in my life. Not to say I’m going to stop beating them at Organ Attack or trash talking them for the fun of it, because I’m still me you know.

Do you have people in your life you can just be with? Hug them today.

Whatever you’re dealing with today, wherever you are, take the time to be thankful that our world still has views like this in it. Even in this sweltering heat, or if you’re somewhere in the pouring rain or unbearable cold, there is beauty still out there.

I’ve always loved the sea, and it holds a special place in my heart, being a gal from a country of 7107 islands does that to you. I am still in awe of what our country has in natural resources and I hope the next generation can still get to enjoy it, without filters, without cameras, just enjoy the cool feeling of water with fine sand between their toes.

What views do you have today?

I was very fortunate this weekend to be able to have spent time with 3(!) great friends from different places and one of them brought up something that made me think. She said, she had come to think about friends she’s lost along the way, what happened, was it her fault, and her attempts to fix it. And I guess I have gone through some of the same process every so often. Working the night shift, and working from home tends to put you in a bubble. While it is very convenient, it also makes things quite difficult in terms of your social life. There is no casual “Let’s grab a coffee on our next break”, or that shared elevator conversation right before you leave for home. Friendships, in my almost decade working from home, need work. It’s like any other relationship, if you don’t tend to it, either it, 1. flourishes by itself but can tend to be quite the surface-y type things that don’t really take root, 2. falls away, 3. evolves into something quite different.

I have some friendships that are amazing and just pick up where they leave off at any time, but the rarity of these come with growing up together. My friends from grade school, we tend to see each other at most 2-3 times a year, but we won’t hesitate to take a weeklong trip together or go to a foreign country with 1 room and 1 bathroom. The advantage of this friendship is that they’ve known me from preschool and while we didn’t share adolescence together, we’re never too far apart to pick up a pen and write in the 90s, to email in the 00s, and now, messaging each other so often.

But I digress (I DO THIS A LOT). I have a group of friends that I may never forgive myself for letting fall away when it became emotionally difficult to see them. I let someone else dictate my life and while there is blame to share, I take full responsibility for this friendship to have fallen away.

I have a few friendships that I have been tempted to be more upfront with, when you see friends do stuff to themselves that your gut tells you will not be good for them, your instinct is to tell them off and give them “The Talk”. The thing is, when someone doesn’t want to hear it, they won’t listen. They’ll do it anyway and resent you for the things you said about it, and you’ll most likely end up just being that condescending friend that they avoid until their situation is good again, and I don’t want to be that friend. My philosophy now is to be there for people, even when it’s difficult to shut up. Especially when it’s difficult to shut up and slap them silly to wake up. Of course when they’re breaking laws and causing other people pain, it will be good to say something constructive and not just critical, but my current mindset is “Walang basagan ng trip.” (Loosely translates to, “Let people be.”

I am quite grateful (here I am again with Mondays and gratitude) to have been able to spend the time and hang out with people that I love. And as I keep saying, I am fiercely loyal to friendships and can be quite protective of the people in my circles. And for that I apologize when I go overboard, but also thank the universe for letting me feel this connected to the people I love.

When was the last time you hung out with a good friend?