Chester and I lost our girl late Friday night to a bad bout of GI stasis. We were able to say goodbye and hold her close while she left this existence.
We are both broken.
Category: Jodythinks
Life is short, week 26 of 52
Status update: Migraines and insomnia. Advil close to running out, and Tylenol has stopped working for headaches. Is the insomnia causing the migraines or are the migraines causing the insomnia?
Life is short moments of the week:
1. Chipped teeth getting fixed. Teeth are expensive, and now even more so. I broke two front teeth and was semi-hillbilly like for a day. It was nice seeing the dentist I’ve seen since I was in the single digits. Couple decades later and we’ve seen her get married, have two kids, and now have one graduate college.
2. Routine checkups turning into health scares. Mom is great about regular checkups, dad not so much. She took him with her on a routine checkup that turned very scary for a couple days. Thankfully it was handled (not by me, but people who are actually awake and around when doctors are on), but here’s crossing all fingers and toes that it resolves soon. I haven’t seen my doctors since the pandemic started, but I hope it’s not terrible. (i know i know. I’ll figure it out)
3. Seeing family. Family time is amazing and is a great way to reset. We had to go home for Ninang’s 40 days, and to finally clean out Nanay’s things. As a grandkid that didn’t grow up with her and having limited shared memories, I was very thankful to have an opportunity to reminisce. Also to take some of her things home. I’m literally going to be rocking some grandma style soon and I can’t wait.
Song of the week: Hold my Hand by Jess Glynne
-J
Life is short, week 25 of 52
Status update: Two almost caffeine migraines, and antihistamine sleep aids with some random af nightmares.
Life is short moments of note:
1. Learning to make a childhood favorite. I have an aunt that makes the most amazing food. She has always been skilled in the kitchen. Anything that she makes is the best version of it (but definitely the least healthy). My favorite is a squash vegetable mix that she makes with okra, eggplant, fresh shrimp shells, and apparently, the fat from frying pork. I made it this week with the shrimp shells i stuck in the freezer, but no pork fat oil. It was great, but missing squash blossoms and a bit more umami (just needs more oink). But it was great. It reminds me the next time I’m in the bay, I’ll ask her for her cooking secrets. Nobody writes anything down in this family.
2. Assembling my first desk. I have always had help with my furniture, and the last thing I assembled I’ve thrown out because of my shoddy work, and almost gave up on the replacement as well. My other desk, which was a gift, was falling apart. I was picking up screws and hinges and it was basically at risk of collapsing any moment. I knew I shouldn’t be too dependent on other, more skilled people and learn to at least put together a desk. So I did. It hasn’t fallen apart yet which is promising.
3. Baked goods. I have been having entirely too much. But in a very comforting way. I know I need to have less sugar — but it helps to stay awake. And have something nice when things are rough.
Song of the week: Have a Little Faith In Me by Joe Cocker
-J
Life is short, week 24 of 52
This week would’ve been Anthony Bourdain’s 66th birthday. He couldn’t get himself away from his demons. I need to live because he couldn’t anymore.
-J
Life is short, week 23 of 52
Status report: Hives, 5 out of 7 days. I’m going to need to restock antihistamines soon.
Life is short moments of the week:
1. Getting to my favorite local market. Farmer’s market has always been solid. Super fresh veggies and seafood in reasonable prices. Which meant I spent more than usual on veggies and fresh ingredients. Scored sashimi, lemons, and such fresh shrimp. Always makes me feel better, even if my wallet feels lighter.
2. My favorite Italian place in the city. In the 90s, an Italian former papparazo married a Filipina, and they opened a restaurant in Cubao Expo. It was exceptionally good that day — everything was done a la minute and served perfectly. My mom was groaning in fullness but it was only because her pants weren’t stretchy and her belt was high up. She is the most of the three of us to want to suffer for fashion.
3. The best new smell i’ve smelled in a while. While at Cubao Expo, Joannaman pointed out a candle shop she said she follows on Instagram. It was The Doctor Chandler shop. First sniff and we were hooked. Mom bought their Oxytocin scent within the first 4 minutes, while Joannaman and I spent 15 minutes smelling most of everything. We had to narrow down our likes to one, and I picked Testosterone. Joannaman didn’t buy anything, but my list of what else to try are Adrenaline, Carbon and Oxygen. I am frankly obsessed and light this candle when I wind down at the end of the day and am lying down. I will prolly do this until I get super tired of it.
Song of the week: The Story by Brandi Carlile
-J
Life is short, week 22 of 52
Status report: Little sleep = more migraines. But heart happy because of making time to get a life.
Life is short moments of the week:
1. Enjoying something on trend. Ikea opened up late last year, and my mom and sister got to it before I did. They took me last week and I enjoyed myself more than I thought it would. Mostly coz they were super pumped too. Even if I wanted to be rolled out of pallet by the time it was over. It was fun and I found things I liked that I don’t know how to install.
2. Making food for friends. I wanted to see my friends. My friends are busy people with lives that actually work in the days. I made food that took two days of prep and a lot of going around doing things, but it was worth every second. Not to mention they assembled my furniture for me. All in all 11/10 time used.
3. Nostalgic favorites. There’s a family recipe for iced tea that I never make because it takes so much time and I end up drinking a whole lot of it, and it’s sugary stuff. I took the time to make it last week and sure enough, I am still drinking it up to now. It’s not healthy but it does make me happy. Sugary drinks will be the end of me — but it helps with the hypoglycemia and short bursts of fun things.
Song of the week: Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now by Starship
-J
Life is short, week 21 of 52
Status report: Caffeine withdrawal migraines and regular hives. Aka back home and normal for my old age
Life Is Short moments of the week:
1. Being able to say goodbye, and hug loved ones I haven’t seen the past two years. It feels like a lot of my updates sound dramatic. Long story short, a great aunt passed away last week, and I was driving. We missed her passing by 30 minutes. I was feeling so bad about it, but found our later she hasn’t been conscious in three days.
While it was a sucky reason to finally be able to go home to my mom’s hometown, it was such a blessing to hug and spend time with the family, which we haven’t done since 2020(!). Hopefully no one gets sick so we can keep seeing each other.
2. Spontaneous outings. With my friends being adults (mothers, fathers, grandmothers, caregivers to seniors, etc), it takes so much to plan time together. When it came together suddenly on a Monday it was too good to worry about being awake 26 hours and counting. We ate at 6 places in 4 hours, and laughed until we got tired.
3. Food delivery. Working nights and getting caught up at work, I sometimes forget to eat until I’m almost blacking out from lack of sugar in my system. By then I’m crashing and eating so much sugary junk to catch up. It’s not healthy, and not a great feeling. So when I know I will be home most of the working week and have no time to make food, I get a full week of food delivered. It is a godsend.
Song of the week: OMW (Back Home) by Clara Benin
-J
Life is short, week 20 of 52
Status report: Back to working nights, a few advils and a caffeine withdrawal migraine. A couple hive eruptions here and there.
1. Being in a completely foreign county and feeling at home. I don’t know why, but since I first visited, Orange County has felt like home. Going back — even for a week, just feels like the smells and streets are homey. I do know that most of it are the people I have other there, but I have a general sense of direction now. Which, if you know me in real life, is a big frigging deal.
2. Getting home safe. After a smidge of a delay, a health emergency, and unexpected medical costs, I finally got home. I know it could have been worse. I know I’m hella lucky to have my loved ones on that side of the world rally and take care of me and make sure I was safe.
3. The buns. Unwilling emotional support animals, agitators, my bunnies lives are more important than mine. They don’t know how much they keep me sane, keep me wanting to show up for them so I show up for me. They’re not young anymore, and I need to keep a closer eye, but they’re still here and I’m grateful.
Song of the week: Happy For Me by Kenzie
-J
Life is short, week 19 of 52
Status report: I adore rain and how it makes everything lush— it also keeps me very cold.
Life is short moments for last week:
1. Diving in. Adventures, rejection, weird things. Living life means risking hurt feelings, annoyed evenings, and wasted time. But it means living. I lived all those and while there are losses, I’m glad to have had memories made.
2. Hot springs. I am a hot springs person. I can’t deny it any longer. I love the relaxing feeling, the calm of being offline. I guess it allows me to just be, and I love that with my mind having a tendency to run away from me.
3. Affection. I just realized how different my love language has changed from words of affirmation to touch has been. I can be in a room and be silent but just lean on a person, or sit next to them in a room. I have a few friends at work that just understand when I walk over for a hug and it is such a game changer in quality of life.
-J
Life is short, week 18 of 52
Status report: Hives 3x this week, no migraines.
Life is short moments to note:
1. A baby hike that was fully squishy. I am not the fittest person. I don’t really go outdoors for fear of frogs. But I actually like the baby hikes that are frog free is what I realize. Two years of being told to stay indoors I guess. Or just seeing other views that are addicting. Who knows.
2. Exploring a walkable city. I love cities you can walk in. Granted I need thermal leggings and puff jackets in weather below 20 degrees celcius, I still love seeing new places that are safe and I can fairly get around without a lot of transportation. I love this city.
3. Having time with a friend. I got to spend a week with one of my favorite people in the world. Just being girls and laughing and getting through weirdness together. I could not have done this without her.
What are your life is short moments for the past week?
-J