When I was younger, I was infatuated with a boy who wrote letters. Honest to goodness pen and paper notes that we would pass between classes or he would drop off at my house. They were thrilling to get, this was at a time when my idea of romance I got from the cutesy movies or teen romance television shows that always showed a milkshake, diner and two straws. Honestly they weren’t so much romantic but they took effort. I hated the phone and I never was comfortable being on it (which continues to this day), but letters I could respond to, and take my time doing so.

Since then I’d always considered writing a way to get closer to people. I still write letters, but have now accepted the fact that emails are the closest I can get to passing notes, especially as now, giving out your actual home address can be such a trusting thing to do. While it hasn’t caught on yet, and it’s been a bit awkward overall, I still believe in the magic of a well written letter.

When was the last time you wrote a letter?

Hi, I usually write these down on Mondays, when I’ve had the weekend to unwind and enjoy days I don’t have to set my alarm, but today feels like a good day to send out gratitude to the universe. So the things I am grateful for today are:

 

1. Chester, who, after I lay down on the bed to type this, jumped on the bed and stuck his head under my arm. I am typing with one hand with the other giving him head pats but it’s all worth it.
2. The half bottle of now chewy Stik-O on my desk, ready for the weekend.
3. This morning actually being cold enough not to have a sweaty stomach during meetings.
4. Chill weekend plans ahead.

Nothing like a dose of gratitude to end the workday and start the actual day with.

What are you grateful for today?

A lot of people tell me in almost a daily basis how amazing they think my mother is. I am here to make a rebuttal. I kid of course. I don’t think she’s amazing, I think she works hard at it. It takes a lot of work for my mom to get here and still keep at it on a daily basis. She’s made a lot of hard, and mostly practical choices for our family to be comfortable, to get her kids here, and sacrificed a whole lot for us to have the best in life she can possibly offer. Even as an adult, she still gives us an opportunity to learn by example, and sometimes, when we need it, the hard knock on the (emotional) head.

I’ve come to interact more with my mother as an adult and it’s not always been the case. She was quite strict growing up. No boyfriends when still at school. Curfews. Making sure grades were good. She would give us everything we NEEDED but not everything we WANTED which forced us to value everything we bought for ourselves, and to value what we buy now, and to take care of things. When you had to work for something, it’s harder to not take care of it, or attach emotional value to it because you spent time to get to it, and not just handed the thing on a platter.

It’s difficult being mom. We rely on her alot. We ask her to call people we can call ourselves because she’s the “adultier adult”. We ask her to cook difficult, complex things. We’re all still at home, eating her out of said home. We’re not the easiest to be with when we need more sleep. We’re not the most religious, but she is. It’s a whole host of things that keeps her going, going going. She has GERD, so she’s had to give up coffee, too much acidic food, and lying down flat on the bed. I can’t even begin to start on all her other projects. She likes to do a lot, which also keeps her busy a lot, and at 64, I don’t know how she has the energy.

So here is my non-rebuttal, rebuttal. My mom isn’t amazing. She does the frigging work. And so does the rest of your moms. So I hope you treated her to an amazing meal or a massage, or both. Because motherhood is frigging hard. Ask your mom.

Can you tell me about your mom?

Adele has wonderful music and that voice is amazing. It’s hard to pick a favorite from her hits, but my favorite from her songs is one from her 21 album, Turning Tables. Maybe it’s the violins, maybe it’s just how she sounds in it, but I really love it. It sounds sad with the melody, but the lyrics are really pretty strong.

Check out this chorus/bridge:

So, I won’t let you close enough to hurt me,
No, I won’t rescue you to just desert me
I can’t give you the heart you think you gave me
It’s time to say goodbye to turning tables
Turning tables

Next time I’ll be braver
I’ll be my own savior
When the thunder calls for me

To me it just means she’s standing up for herself after being hurt. And I think we need to remember that we have ourselves as our own saviors, because we were built to be amazing. You’re amazing. Remember that.

What song are you listening to today?

I like thinking that in the most basic sense, we’re all a bit similar. We have to breathe to live. We need to eat to survive. We create waste. We like to think of ourselves as contributing to the overall sense of the universe. I also think we all have something that makes us different from other people, the things that make us, the people we are.

I’m not trying to start a philosophical debate here on what makes us human, is it our memories, is it our ability to speak and communicate, is it civilization that created the concept and we’re all just living beings not different from animals. Religion would like to say differently and I won’t argue with people’s beliefs. I’m just enjoying the fact that people are so different but also very much the same.

So embrace your weirdness and the things that make you a freak. Eat pasta differently. Don’t eat pasta at all. Hate ice cream and dogs or love them more than other people (I know the joke here, let’s let that pass). As long as it’s not hurting other people, I think self acceptance is more important than trying to fit the ideal. It’s hard trying to be perfect in a high definition world where we’re all measured by the same face value standards when the things we can contribute are harder to add to the scale.

I mean, is a woman who focused on their career and earned millions of dollars better than the woman who stayed at home and personally raised her five kids? Is a man who has cured diseases through research better than one who went to the front lines to fight for peace for their country? Many people will argue for each side, and people will have opinions based on their background and values. Wars have been fought for a lot less than a beautiful woman (I know that Helen of Troy is fictional but hey, what’s up).

But we all have to live in this world, and moment by moment, it gets smaller and smaller. People go viral for a lot of different reasons but we’ll never know the whole, real story behind that widespread moment. Conservatives will hate on the inclusion of things that are against their beliefs while liberals will embrace diversity, but who is really right?

I’m sure we all have our opinions, but the hardest thing now is to accept that we will never all get along. Life is a series of events that shape people and conflict paves the way for change unfortunately, and while people get hurt along the way, all I ask is for you to be kind to one another.

It’s too easy to close off and judge another for their choices when you don’t know what their pain is. So flip the coin and remember when your days were difficult and your morale was low before you go attack another person online or in person. We all need a bit of kindness sometimes.

P.S. My tiny freakiness that I will share is that I need stick wafers to be extremely almost rubbery after a day of the jar opening, and I eat it by peeling the layers off. I find it fun but also need a lot of patience to do this.

When was the last time you thought you were weird?

One thing about having bunnies, it’s really hard to find vets that actually treat them. 99.9% of vets in the Philippines deal with only dogs and cats. I’ve been fortunate to have found the .1% that are rabbit savvy, and Doc Ferdz is my favorite. Ever since he opened his Animal Wellness Center in Panay Avenue (Now they have a branch at UP Town Center too!) we’ve been going to him for checkups and other concerns for Chibi and Chester.

 

It’s not just that he’s very nice to look at (let’s be honest here), it’s the effort and personal care he provides. He responds via text for availability. He actually checks in himself via text how the buns are doing. He arrives on time (sometimes even earlier than he promised), and if circumstances (aka traffic) change, he apologizes profusely for being late. He gets to know the patients, and he makes sure all the assistants handle the buns carefully and in the manner they need to be.

Yesterday, we had to bring in the buns for a checkup and I was really nervous about it. I was shaking, honestly. He immediately made sure we were put at ease, and while the most recommended treatment wasn’t readily available (as the circumstances with bunnies are), he told his staff to order the needed medication while we were there. In the meantime he had a ready, (albeit slower) alternative. He even gave them a thorough look over to make sure everything was all right and noticed something I had missed, and pointed out that because Chibi was a lot more jumpy, he would need to put her under sedation to address it. Since he had scheduled surgeries for the day, we scheduled it for next week. I wonder if I can be put under sedation until then as well as anything about my rabbits, I am more scared for than my own health. Our last rabbit that had an issue, we brought in too late and she died in my arms. I hope to never have to go through that again and that’s why I take every precaution and spend more for my buns than myself, giving them better care as they are less sturdy than I am.

I’m sure I will be shaking until the procedure is over but I know my rabbits are in good hands with Doc Ferdz. If you have any pets and want personal, amazing care, Doc Ferdz is your guy. The clinic is also really well kept, and rooms are always very thoroughly sanitized between patients. I know that Chester, who hates being out of his routine, relaxes much faster when visiting him than any other doctor we’ve gone to, and can actually eat in the clinic itself (unheard of at other trips/clinics). We love Doc Ferdz and we think your beloved pets should feel his care too.

If you need to reach him:

Website: http://www.docferdsawc.com/

Landline for the Panay clinic: 02-3763251

Address: 5 Landsdale Arcade, Timog Ave., Quezon City, Philippines

 

 

My planner has alerted me to the fact that Earth Day is coming up on Saturday, April 21. I’m not sure how accurate it is, and if there’s still an Earth Hour that’s to happen on the date, but I do think the earth has been on everyone’s radar in the past few years, with all the change in weather, and the extremes it gotten. A friend in Minnesota shared a record breaking snowfall in her front yard in Spring. The Philippines has hit the sweltering summer, with temperatures at 34-36 degrees Celsius (around 95-98 degrees Fahrenheit for the folks in the US) during the day, and in the high 20s in the evening (high 80s in F) with humidity at 65% above on the daily.

That’s not easy for anyone, and for us night shift folks, it’s become even harder to sleep during the day when you’re all sweaty and the sun is bearing down on everyone. I find myself cranking up the AC all the while finding myself with a lot of earth guilt because my use of electricity can’t be helping much in the way of bills and the overall environment. So while I am not the expert, here’s what I do to reduce my carbon footprint so that our future generations can still enjoy the planet we’re living in.

1. Bringing my own water bottle. I have several bottles accumulated over the seasons of water bottles that I can just refill so I don’t have to buy bottled water. I can hardly remember the last time I’ve bought water outside so it not just helping me with my mild tree hugging, it also keeps us from contributing to the purchase of a million water bottles per minute (per this article from Forbes in June 2017). Want to keep your liquids cold/hot? Get a double walled insulated bottle to keep it the temperature you want. Drink a lot of water? Get a bigger bottle (my biggest one is the 40 oz Hydroflask). I also have a smaller bottle that I can store in smaller bags that I use when I travel (just remember to empty the bottle when going through the airport). Need a special bottle for drinks? I got gifted a frapuccino type bottle in the past that I’ve used when buying my icy drinks from Starbucks, which saves the bottle and the straw. Speaking of straws…
2. Refusing straws. Even before this was a thing with everyone, I’ve refused straws. I’ve been hyperacidic since elementary school (when you prioritize running around during recess and lunch over actual food and drink iced tea instead, it happens) and one thing my doctor told me to help lessen air in my stomach is to not use straws. Since then I’ve usually said no to straws, and now we actually bought metal reusable ones for when we have need of it, like shakes or other frozen drinks.
3. Buying secondhand. From thrift store clothing to books and secondhand cars, there are several ways to go about this. Simply put, if they don’t have to manufacture it, that’s less energy being spent on new things, and power being used, and you reduce stuff getting sent to landfills. Giving new life to “preloved” items will make not just for a step in saving your wallet, but also your environment.
4. Having reusable bags handy. The city we live in charges P2 for every plastic bag as a deterrent to people using them. I have had a reusable bag or two in my bag for a few years now. I lost one in an uber that meant a lot to me but I hope is now in service with another person, and late last year, I found the same one on a trip to South Korea and bought three just in case. They’re lightweight, usually more durable and can carry more stuff than plastic, and well, mine are pink pig bags that fold into a circular smooshable thing that’s smaller than a coin purse. For smaller things like medicine or makeup, I usually ask if I can just stuff it in my bag instead of them having to wrap it in a paper bag, which saves us both paper waste and space.
5. Supporting local anything. This is a fairly recent thing to be honest, but if you know of a local, smaller business and have a little extra money to spend, go local. In the PH, local usually means a bit more expensive, but not if you go to your neighborhood palengke (wet market) and patronizing your favorite seller. It may mean not just a trusted relationship where they give you a bit more discounts, if not just the best of their stock since they know you’ll be back to buy again and again. All the better when you know the farmer and grower. When you next visit a place in the PH, check out the local produce, which will most likely be dirt cheap, and you’ll not just be saving for yourself, but you’ll also be helping someone with a family that is most likely farming/fishing/butchering them all themselves. This also goes the same for local crafts. My current obsession are local textiles. Inabel from Ilocos, Sagada weaving, malongs from Mindanao. They’re not only gorgeous and use natural fabrics, they’re also handmade and not shipped overseas to add to the fuel burning that is the case for imports.
6. Go paperless. For any billing that you can choose to go electronic for, do it. It may not be as easy for dinosaurs like me to organize, but the choice for electronic billing and payment helps in a lot of ways. No fuel to burn to deliver, no ink is used, no paper wasted. It may mean you have to keep track in other ways, but paperless is that little choice to do a little bit less waste and more efficient.
7. Metal utensils. From spoons, forks and chopsticks, bring your own or refuse the plastic ones. We realized as a family how often we had to chuck single use utensils and in 2018 we started refusing wooden chopsticks even when dining out. Either we brought our own or we just used the metal spoons and forks. Refuse the single use utensils when eating out. You can even bring your own bottles to fast food joints and they can fill it with the same amount of drink. Single use utensils are overflowing in landfills and when you start to notice it, you’ll find how often your own trash is full with them.
8. Eat less packaged food. Health aside, junk food and other instant things are packaged in non recyclable plastic. Veggies and fruit come with less, or even no packaging at all. Snack on an apple with Lily’s peanut butter, or celery/carrot sticks with homemade dressing (or none). This was brought to my attention when eating at home. When I had snacks that I could share with my bunnies, I usually had to use a bowl instead of throwing away a bag. It helps not only the earth but your waistline as well. Less junk in you, less junk around you.
9. Unplug. I noticed that Filipinos rarely leave anything plugged to save money on bills, but that saves the earth too. Plugged in appliances use low amounts of energy and are in standby mode when plugged in, even when unused. Keep yourself thrifty and fire safe by unplugging everything you can. Your phone charger after every charge. Laptop chargers unplugged can help keep the battery last longer. Appliances like microwaves and desktop computers should be easy to unplug when you’re done using them, and it’s an extra second of time.
10. Be mindful of water use. Shut off the tap while you do that 3 minute hand wash, use a glass to keep water handy to brush your teeth instead of having running water on. Manually flush or update your toilet to those that use less water with every flush. Use a filter instead of having water delivered. The world is mostly water, but there is less and less clean options as there are more people in the world. The less dirty water that needs to be treated, the less you have to think about where that water’s been and had to go through on a daily basis, lower water bill too.

Again, I’m not the expert here, but there are things I’ve personally used in my life that are less than painful to adjust to, and there are more adjustments I’m looking to do soon. Things like mindful exercise and adopting shelter pets, small to big things that will save this earth for the next generation. Until Elon Musk can get us to live on Mars, this is the only planet we’ve got, and I think we all carry the responsibility to do our bit to keep it healthy.

What do you do for the earth that’s not on this list?